Tuesday, 28 February 2012

Excuses for wasting time

Today at my weight watchers meeting (yes I am still trying to lose more weight), we discussed excuses for not exercising.  As much as the leader tried to phrase it to get people to agree that if they looked at it in a different  way, like a night out, or time to themselves etc they may tend to do it more, I had to disagree.  The toss up between going and running and laying around reading, being lazy wins every time for me.

I came to realization that the only thing that keeps me running is fear.  Fear of gaining the weight back, fear of looking like an idiot when I do my run at the end of April, at this point even the fear of failure can motivate me.  I guess that means in the bribery vs punishment system I am a punishment girl.  I will do what needs to be done, not for the reward but to avoid the pain at the end.

The thing is, it is so easy to have other things to do, a good book to finish, the housework that needs doing (who am I  kidding, I think I may even prefer running to housework - but its a close call), dinner to be cooked, shopping to be done, even that long lost friend who you have not spoken to in ages, its definitely time to call them rather than run.

I have been running long enough now that it is a habit, I do feel bad if I don't get at least 3 runs a week in.  My body knows and feels like crap if I am lazy.  Also I love the feeling after the run, that feeling of accomplishment, of knowing I did my best time, or furthest distance, or even that I got the run done and worked up a sweat.  However all this does not help to make it any easier to get my butt out for a run.  We all know I have no issue with putting on my running  clothes, I can get as far as being dressed, having my iPod in and then spend the day on the couch listening to music rather than take those extra few steps of lacing up my shoes and heading out.  

I am easily distracted and easily unmotivated, in fact I just took a 30 minute distraction break from typing this out to half complete a form I need to for my brother.  Notice how I said half complete, I got distracted from my distraction by my original task...pretty lame!  Of course I could just say I am a multi-tasker and using my great organization abilities.

Sometimes excuses work in your favor, I mean it is great that doing the taxes seems like more fun than running right?  They need to get done, you get money back. Again, who am I kidding?!?  taxes vs running, I am off for a run! I hate doing the taxes! But you get my meaning, sometimes the excuse may mean you get something else that has been sitting there done since it is the lesser of the two evils.

My excuse for today is I am sitting here waiting for a phone call from the place the kids want to have their birthday party at.  I don't want to miss the call as I need to book it and get the invitations out this week.  Maybe if they call me back soon I will get my ass  into my running clothes and.....well we wont hold our breath, time is ticking away and its nearly lunch time.

Saturday, 25 February 2012

Things my children will one day understand - Part Deux

Image By: Monique Jansen

  • There are toys that mommy keeps forgetting to buy batteries for, I am really sorry. And for some reason, even when you have put them on my shopping list the store is out of that size. There is absolutely no correlation between this and how annoying your dad and I find those particular toys....nope none whatsoever!
  • No amount of negotiation is going to change your school night bedtime. I don't really care if you are not tired, I am! Go in your room and lie in bed talking to each other till you fall asleep. This is my time to unwind, relax and clean up the kitchen before decent tv starts for the night.
  • When you come down from a time out, it is a good time to look subdued and remorseful. Do not come down and immediately start arguing over why you were unjustly sent for a timeout. Even if you were, this is not going to help. In fact it will more than likely result in you being sent back to your room.
  • Refusing to eat your dinner because you are "full" and then suddenly getting hungry for a sandwich later on is not going to work.
  • Occasionally I will ask you what you want for dinner and give you some options to choose from. This is usually when I have nothing prepared. If you cant come to an agreement between the two of you, I will pick the easiest and quickest thing to cook and you will eat it. I will not be making you two separate meals just because you both picked different things.
  • On weekends when Mommys and Daddys like to sleep in, it is not a good idea to come through and tell me that you are awake and going downstairs. Just go, raid the cereal cupboard and watch some tv.....quietly!!
  • Asking me to leave the room so you can play does not really make me want to rush out and leave you to your own devices. Also, if you have hidden something you don't want me to find, telling me where "not to look" is usually a good place for me to immediately go to. I know one day you will clue into this and probably start messing with my head using it to your advantage, but for now I love that you are pretty transparent.
  • This one is for Diggle alone....it is insanely creepy when you sneak up and scare the crap out of me! You have made my hair stand on end! Please stop....just stop!

Thursday, 23 February 2012

Gluteus Maximus

I have a pulled butt muscle!  Its just lovely and I don't even have a good story to tell you about how it happened.  In fact I am not even sure how it happened as I first felt it a good 24 hours after a run, I was climbing out the car to get the kids from school when I felt it twinge!  Just great, there goes my running for the next while, while I rest my butt - literally!

So I guess I am supposed to implement RICE here....

Rest - well ok, how much can I rest, I can stop running, but I cant stop walking, cleaning up after the kids and general activity, the family would starve and the kids would never get home from school....hmmm, theres an interesting thought.

Ice - I could go and sit my butt outside in the snow!  Or I suppose the less inventive way would be to shove an ice pack down my pants!

Compression - How to compress my butt?  I have no idea, if I could do this I would have done it years ago, it would have saved me a fortune in dieting!

Elevation - I don't care I am not putting my butt in the air while I rest!

I guess I could go for a massage, although I feel a little bashful to phone and book myself in for a butt massage, anyone got any ideas on this one?  I am thinking I probably just have to wait it out and hope it heals quickly.


Today in my effort not to run I cleaned the house a bit and did some of the paperwork that I had been putting off for the last 6 months as I found this particular task too daunting.  Surprisingly once I started it I found it was relatively simple and within an hour I had it completed and have felt a huge sense of relief to have it off my desk instead of sitting under my keyboard trying to be ignored.

I also did a general clean of my desk which led me to find some unclaimed medical expenses which I submitted and even got me to check that the cheque for DH's life insurance cleared before the renewal date.  Not that I plan on offing him in the near future, but you can never be too prepared (in the life insurance and ways to off him department).

Tomorrow we are expecting a snow storm, our first majorish one of the winter.  It seems really odd to be thinking of that only now near the end of February.  It will be good to have some snow around though, so maybe this weekend we can get out sledding with the kids.  I guess shoveling the snow from the driveway tomorrow will be my exercise, that can't use too many butt muscles can it?
Oh and the bright side, I may even get to  sit down for a while and ice my butt!

Monday, 20 February 2012

Family Day

Well the good news is I am not in hospital, I survived my ice skating escapade yesterday. In fact I skated the best I ever have, and did not land on my ass or head at any time! I think it was my awesome new skates, along with my new attitude towards doing all these things I have been too scared or lax to do before.

Today was Family Day here in Canada, a holiday for most people. Its a day created for us to spend time with family, I guess in order to make you appreciate them more?

 We went canoe shopping with the kids. About three hours in the car with the kids asking for snacks (which fortunately I had), and playing their DS's. A few grumbles and thankfully no one needing to stop to pee.  Along with the road trip, factor in a good hour at the canoe place trying to keep the kids from knocking all the canoes over and doing any damage, while discussing the merits of various models vs cost and weights with DH.
I appreciate my family really well now! Actually I appreciate how it could have been worse too. DH and I got into a little discussion on the way home when I was supposed to be navigating and he missed the turn off for a road he knew we needed to take.  Apparently I was too wrapped up looking at something on twitter to notice we were getting close to the turn off and tell him.  So it took us a little longer to get home via the scenic route.

After we got home, DH settled down to watch a movie with the kids and I went down to run off some frustrations to hit the treadmill. I actually got a really good run in and felt much better.

 Now it's time for the kids to go to bed, ah peace at last, so I am planning to curl up in bed and watch tv for the night, sounds like perfect Family Day time to me!

Sunday, 19 February 2012

Skating On Thin Ice

My next post may be coming to you from a hospital bed. Why? You ask. Well I bought myself a pair of ice skates, and this afternoon I am going to try and ice skate for the first time in about 9 years. I was never very good 9 years ago and then I had my two incidences involving ice, both of which led to hospital visits, stitches and surgeries. So with that track record why am I attempting this? Well, I live in Canada, I have young children and I want to be able to do the whole embracing of winter sports thing with them. I want to be able to skate on the outdoor rinks and sip hot chocolate afterwards to warm up. I don't want to be the parent standing on the side watching and wishing they were finished already so we can go home and be warm. Maybe I will be the parent on the ice wishing we could go home and get warm, but I have to try.

I got a nice pair of skates, they are the more comfortable recreation skates, along with an easy lace up dial that you turn. Anything to make my life a little easier! They are super quick to put on, something I need as the kids are always eager to go once I have them laced up, so if I have to spend 5 minutes lacing my own boots I will be ready to get back in the car before they are done.

Am I scared about doing this? Yes, I am terrified of setting foot on the ice. I am convinced I will land on my ass and embarrass myself in front of my friends, but if I do I will live. At least I hope I will live, I really don't need any more scars, they may be sexy on a guy, but I have my fill and already have to use makeup to cover some up.

I will warn the kids to stay away from me while I attempt this, as anyone near me is fair game to be thrown down under me to soften my landing, they are wearing helmets and can take the knock. Maybe I need to look for a really well padded hat? Maybe I just need to look for sanity!  Regardless if you don't hear from me for a while send flowers to the local hospital.

Friday, 17 February 2012

The dog ate my homework

No really, she did! Twice!  I guess that's what you get for doing homework out of something edible, although with our dog it would not even have to be edible!

Diggle had his 100 day project done. He made a picture of a boy fishing, with fish etc, using 100 goldfish crackers. We glued them onto a piece of cardboard and left it to dry on the table. Monster dog jumped up onto the table and ate half the crackers. We redid the picture, moved it so that monster could not get to it and left it to dry. It dried, was looking great and Princess decided to move it, the next morning monster ate the boy and the sun. We redid it again and this time warned anyone who moved it would be in deep trouble.  Diggle got to take it to school this time and do his presentation then guess what?  The class promptly tucked in and ripped all the crackers off and ate them....good thing I used non toxic glue!  It's also a good thing I had the insight to buy two bags of crackers!

She is still stealing mitts, and the odd toy, but she has not destroyed the last few, she runs around with them in her mouth whining till I take them away, I think she knows she should not have it, and is conflicted about whether she should rip it apart or hide the evidence quickly.

I have found she is trainable, I now have her trained that when I am about to go out somewhere I say in your box and point, and she runs into her crate and lies down. Her being happy to be crated while I am out is wonderful, as I no longer have to worry that she is howling and disturbing the neighbours, and no longer have to worry and wonder what part of my house or possessions will be destroyed by the time I get home.

Now if I could get her to stop climbing on the tables and taking food out of the kids hands we may be getting somewhere.

Despite all that the monster dog has eaten she seems to have wormed her way into our hearts. Even DH who was in favour of sending her to the pound for the 1st 8 months of her life with us seems to have come around. I heard him telling her he loved her the other night while cuddling her in front of the fireplace. Of course this was after an awful lot of red wine, and about 10 minutes later he was snoring on the floor, so I am sure he will deny it verhimintly if questioned, either that or he was talking to his glass of red wine!

Tuesday, 14 February 2012

Valentines Day

Maybe I am just bitter and jaded?  But seriously is it not just a bunch of over hyped bullshit?  A special day to tell everyone in our lives how much we love them?  I could even get behind maybe just telling your spouse (ha, that sounds like I want to tell your spouse not mine - somedays that's probably true) that you love them, but why do we need to treat our kids? I tell them I love them every day, I don't need to give them a card or make them a special breakfast just because its valentines day.  Was it not enough that I helped the kids put together cards for all their class so that they were not the social outcasts?  I fed them breakfast, not a special one, just cereal, I kissed them when I dropped them off at school and told them to have a good day.

I don't want candy or flowers, or even a card, does that make me strange?  Why spend money on a card or overpriced flowers just because today is the day you are "supposed" to?  I would far rather get flowers as a surprise on another day of the year, just because DH thought "hey lets get the old hag something so she will put out tonight."  It would mean so much more.

I remember being a teenager, hoping for the valentines cards, that was about the only time I enjoyed it, but even then it was not like I got a whole slew of cards.  Then I met DH, I think I got a card for the 1st few years and we did go out to dinner.

My main problem is DH's birthday is tomorrow, the day after valentines day, and I would rather go out and make his birthday special than on some over popularized holiday crap.  And I am not going out two nights in a row, so ultimately we don't end up doing much.

I am feeling frustrated like I want to punch someone, my heart is racing, maybe its all the love out there,  maybe I have eaten too many of those heart shaped chocolates....well they were on sale.
Anyway its nearly dinner time, DH just phoned to say lets at least cook something nice for dinner tonight, bah humbug! I told him to stop at the store on the way home then and buy something.  The kids are getting pasta, and I'll probably put out tonight anyway even without flowers and a card.

Saturday, 11 February 2012

Random things you never expected to say.

  • What are you eating? No, I don't have any raisins, and have not had any in the house for months, spit it out.....for the love of God spit it put right now!
  • No we cannot use your toothpaste after it has fallen in the toilet.
Image By: Monique Jansen
  • Just bite him back then 
  • No they did not have to cut you out of Mommys tummy.  How did you get out then?  Erm, yes they cut you out.
  • No that bath toy is not supposed to fit on your penis, take it off now.
  • The tooth fairy must have been really busy last night, I bet if you go and check after breakfast you will find she was just running late.
  • Do not drink the bath water!  Do not pretend you are a fountain and put the bath water in your mouth.
  • No sweetheart, no matter how great you think it will be to be older and have floppy boobs just like  mom, you really don't want that trust me.
  • I don't  care if you are playing puppy dogs, tying a leash around your brothers neck is not happening.
  • No Daddys hair really did not fall off his head and land lower down.
  • Just ignore your father.
  • What did I just step in?
  • I don't care, you still have to wear underpants!

Thursday, 9 February 2012


Image by Kemy
It's a wonderful thing!  
Yesterday for a change I decided to take a day for myself and I relished in it.  The day started out with all good intentions of at least getting a run in before I wallowed in my laziness, but in reality it got as far as me putting on my running clothes.  Well that has to count for something?  I at least looked active while being lazy.  

I have not had a day to myself with nothing pressing to do in forever, in fact yesterday was not one of those days either, however I chose to completely ignore all the things that needed doing, all the mess that lay around, all the paperwork that is on my desk, even a blog post that needed to get done, and pretend that I had nothing better to do than me stuff.

I put a whole bunch of new music on my iPod, I was still intending to run at this stage, so told myself that this was in preparation for this.  Then I listened to some of the music.  After that I decided to watch some tv that I had recorded as I did not feel like running yet.  In fact I had a food hangover from too much sushi the night before, which really made me not feel like doing much, so we will go with that being to blame for everything.

After watching my tv, I had some lunch and, wait for it, the highlight of my day, I curled up on the couch with the monster dog and took a nap!  It was not a long nap, thanks to a bizarre dream about being being in an out of control car (again, going to blame the sushi!), that had me waking up dizzy, and after that I decided if I wanted to be awake to go get the kids from school I had better get off the couch. 

I managed to shuck off my running leggings and throw on a pair of jeans to go get the kids.  I still had on my running/workout top when the evening rolled around, and I have to give DH credit,  when he walked in the door, he never even asked why I was wearing jeans with my running top.  Even more important he never asked if I actually ran or did anything that day.

Monday, 6 February 2012

Peace and quiet

On the weekend I started typing up a blog post complaining about how I was once again sick, how Diggle has been sick for the last week, and how miserable we all are.  Then I went back and read it and realized that it was just a whiney blurb on how my life sucks, and really who wants to read that? 

Being stuck in bed on Friday made me realize a few things.  I need more pajamas, my bedroom seriously needs an update with a coat of paint and some organization skills, and the iPad is the best invention ever!

Its now finally Monday and I am currently savoring a few minutes of peace and quiet, the first few I have had alone in the house in 11 days!  Diggle was sick for 7 days, followed right after by a 3 day weekend for the kids, my brain has short circuited.  By this weekend the kids were annoying me, annoying each other and generally trying to be annoying beasts who annoy everyone.  There was wailing, screaming, yelling, hair pulling and tears in the house (and that was just from me!).

On Saturday night they decided they wanted the adventure of sleeping in basement.  After much begging and pleading we agreed to let them try it out.  I figured they would be scared down there by themselves, but hey it was Saturday night, so if they lost a bit of sleep and had to move up to their bedroom eventually no harm.  Well first there was arguing over how dark it should be, Princess wanted a light on on the other side of the basement, Diggle wanted it dark, then the monster dog went down there and stole their cuddlies to try and eat them, then she was licking the kids (probably wanted to eat them too).   Well eventually they all ended up back in bedroom as predicted and we got some sleep.

No, Mommy is not telling you
she put the last roll
of toilet paper!

Image by: Roadsidepictures
This morning I got the kids off to school, had enough time to run home and phone my Mother to check on how the family on the other side of the world is, and then run back to meet the kids class for their skating trip.  After skating it was a quick run to the grocery store (it does not help if you have three bathrooms if only one of them has toilet paper).  Finally I am home and have an hour before going to get the kids from school, what should I do with that hour?  Nap?  Clean?  Watch TV?  Nope, I figured even if I don't have much to say now was a good time to try and get a blog post up.

Wednesday, 1 February 2012

Things not to type in a blog

I typed up a blog post the other day, but got sidetracked before posting it.  In hindsite I think this was a good thing.  Ok, It was not as much sidetracked as an "oh shit how did it get that late, the kids are going to be out of school and I am not going to make it there in time to get them" moment.  Anyway when I got back I decided not to post it.  I came to the realization that there are some things you probably should not blog about when people who know you (or people who you are bitching about) may happen to read the blog.

  • Issues with friends (unless they are really close friends who can take it)
  • Drama or feelings on your work or your significant others workplace, bosses or co-workers even if they are idiots. 
  • Bitching about irritating things your extended family does (this of course excludes DH, obviously I can bitch all I want about him, what 's he going do about it?)
  • The fact that anyone, be it a friend or family member is taking a "sickie day" from work or doing something illegal or immoral, no matter how entertaining  or funny it is.
  • Thoughts on culture, race, religion and politics.  Lets face it no matter how much of a bigot or how liberal you are not all your readers (or even all your friends) are going to think the same way.
  • Anything after a couple of glasses of wine or any other form of alcohol or drug.  This one should be self explanatory! Think drunk texting or drunk dialing. Boy am I glad we did not have cell phones around when I was a teenager. 
  • Anything that is going to make someone who you know pissed at you, unless you have too many friends and want to whittle down the list a little.

OMG! Did you really just type that?
Image by: aquababe

Now I dont know if I can stick to the last two, after all I have some of my best thoughts after wine!  Maybe I can stick to not publishing the post until I have had time to re read it the next morning.
Also I am pretty certain there are people who are already pissed at me for my blog just because I am uncensored and candid in it, and have probably already offended their delicate sensibilities in that, but oh well, if they cant take me then by all means please dont read it.
Of course I still have the blog post I typed up the other day saved, so lets hope I don't post it one night after a few glasses of wine!