My friends

This post is dedicated to my friends...I guess everyone has different groups of friends, friends you party with, friends you hang and relax with, even online friends. I am no different I have seem to split my friends into many diverse groups. I have always been a bit of a loner, I like my own company, I am happiest at home by myself. Its a chore to go out and be social and I happen to be very shy.  That being said, I wouldn't want to do without any of these groups, they are all special to me and all do their little bit to keep me sane and make life worth living, including making me get out and interact with the world. Most of these groups consist of women...but I do have men friends too.  These are my groups:

Street Ladies - Or I like to think of us as girls.  This is a group of three of us who live on the same street.  Our kids are all a similar age and fight play together regularly.  We met through our kids and quickly became fast friends and BFF's.  We celebrate together and  get all our families together for parties and events.  Now, I know the age old three women conundrum. The one that states that three women can't remain friends for longer than a few months, due to one always feeling left out and jealousy issues etc, however we have proved this wrong by lasting years. We are secure in our friendship, we know all the dirty details about each other and we are each others crutches when things go wrong.  Without these ladies in my life I would be lost, however I'd also be sober a lot more!

Online friends - This group can be divided into two groups. Facebook Friends - people from past and present. Old school friends, old family friends, people you have met on your life's journey and who have made a difference in your life no matter how large or small, and finally people you hardly know but who you are nosy about.
Twitter friends - I find this one to be made up of people who share similar interests and senses of humour.  People you have never met, but have formed a bond with, even though you are unlikely to ever meet most of them in real life.  They are fun to chat with, good to vent to, and can even help you through some rough situations just by being an impartial observer and shoulder to cry on.  Some of these you will end up meeting, some will become long term friends, some will drift off after a while.  A select few can even become rather special to your every day life.

WW ladies - This is a group of ladies I became friends with accidentally.  I started Weight Watchers before my 40th Birthday to lose some weight.  Slowly a group of us who were attending meetings every week became friends and started chatting.  Now we meet once a week for breakfast, coffee and a chat. We help motivate each other to stick with the weight loss and discuss any topic there is.

SA ladies - My home girls.  I met this group after moving to Canada, a group of ladies from South Africa, a group who just gets me, get where I'm from, knows how I grew up, doesn't think I talk funny or laugh when I call a family room a lounge, or pronounce words with my accent. We share a history, we share a common background and a common struggle to adapt and settle in a new country with a culture we were not familiar with.  We do dinner, we text, we chat, we email, we meet up sometimes for lunch.  When I broke my leg and was laid up unable to move, these are the girls who fed my family and came around and helped me hop around the house - although I did notice none of them offered to clean for me ;)

Family - They say you can't choose your family and its true, however I really can't complain.  For the little family that we have over here in Canada, we do very well.  I have sister-in-laws and brothers who are both family and friends.  I have cousins, their spouses/partners and even their grown up kids who have adopted us  into their family.  The thing with family is that although they can drive you crazy, you love them, you do whatever is needed for them and they do the same for you.  You let them live with you if necessary and sometimes it can surprise you how well you can get along ;)  You know you have a group of people who you can call on, even if you know that it may cause them to grumble, they will do what you ask, and move on, you are family, you will drop everything and help.

Men - Yes Men, lets face it Men deserve their own category.  They are a species unto their own.  I obviously have men friends in my online friends that consist of guys I went to school with, guys I used to dive with, guys I used to drink with and through Twitter even guys I have never met, but share similar interests.  The thing here is, I used to have lots of actual men friends. Growing up in a house of three older brothers I was always one of the guys.  I would drink with the guys, I would hang around with them.  My brothers friends never complained about taking me places, (it became less of a chore to take the friends sister out once she got boobs!) and even when I started dating DH, I was friends with his friends, if he was not around I would still hang out and drink with his friends.  Since I have moved to Canada, I don't have a lot of men friends.  Its weird for the 1st time in my life I am lacking the male friendship interaction.  I have friends husbands, I have my brothers and cousins, I have my online friends and mostly and importantly I have my best friend who I have had as a constant since I was 16, yes that's right, mark it in your calendar, I'm going to be nice...I have DH.

Forgiveness

Today's post is all about forgiveness....both due to the fact that I feel I need some and I owe some. Most importantly I want to say that I don't want any one person to think this is aimed directly at them...in some small way its aimed at so many people in my life.

You know when you have the feeling you owe friends an apology and you don't know quite what to say? Well that's how I feel at the moment, I have been a little self absorbed lately...(who me??), had a few issues of my own in the past few months with losing my Dad etc, and I have not been paying enough attention to my friends.

There are friends who have had troubles, friends who are having troubles and friends who have needed a shoulder to cry on and I have not been around.  I have friends who are not doing so well health wise, and friends who would simply just like to see me for coffee and a chat.  Wow, I sound like I have a bunch of needy, whiny, pain in the ass friends...why do I bother? ;)  The simple fact is, I love you all, you keep me sane and I do miss you.  I am sorry I have not been the best friend the past few months, and I ask for your forgiveness.  I know I don't need to ask, we're friends, we are stronger than a few small issues that get in our way, but I want you to know that I know, I have not been the best friend, in fact, in some cases I realize now I was just downright wrong, and you, being my friends, know how hard that is for me to admit, since we all know I am never wrong!

I also know that in order to receive forgiveness you need to give, and I have friends and family that I need to put issues aside with and move on.  So, I am wiping the slate clean, I don't care at this point what you did or did not do. There will always be times when we disagree and don't believe that the other is handling a situation right, there will always be times where our outlook on other friends and family members differ and we have to accept that and try hard not to piss each other off.  We have made it to a point in our lives where we are not hormonal teens (maybe we are just hormonal adults), so we can, and must move on, we are all we have, without friends and family it's a lonely life.

Onward and upward, summer is round the corner...